The questions below are examples of those you can use to start engaging conversations. Your goal in meeting others is to help them feel at ease and at the same time, generate some conversation that will serve as a springboard for future conversations. You are searching for what we call in Networlding, “Points of Commonality” (things you share in common) and “Points of Credibility” (things that make this person unique and valuable to your network. Take a look at the following questions and think how you could use these questions to start your own engaging conversations. With each question, I add suggestions as to how you can use it to open up further exchange.

So what would be a good first question when you are out social networking. Try asking something like, “What was it that interested you in attending this evening (today, etc.)?

This question is particularly relevant to get someone to talk about something positive. For example, say your connection says, “I came here to see how I could expand my technology company. I specialize in helping other businesses integrate their IT initiatives together so departments are more in alignment with one another.” Now let’s say that you do business with the types of companies this person would like to connect with; now you offer, “I would enjoy meeting with you outside this event to see how we can support one another in meeting companies that could use your skills.

A second great question is, “Who is the best networker in this organization? Hopefully, that person will be at this event and you will be able to get an introduction to him or her. You also want to ask why they chose this person. You will usually find that most people have met great networkers—people who have networks that reach wide and deep and who, in general, enjoy meeting new people and networking with them. Interestingly, though, you will also find that often great networkers don’t’ know or connect with other great networkers. This is one of the best questions as you can be the “connector” to bring these people together, and, in doing so, become part of their networks and a great networker yourself.

Finally a third great question is, “What is one thing you are really looking forward to accomplishing in your business (or career) this year?” The reason this question works so well is two-fold. First, it is positive and directs your conversation to a subject that should add some great energy to the conversation. Second, it should yield one of the best replies you could receive from a question. An example of this question occurred during a networking event we did for a large bank recently. We facilitated a networking event with business owners of companies between $5-$50 million in sales. The result? The bank yielded about twenty business owners who replied that they either were planning to expand their business or that they were planning on purchasing some large piece of equipment. Now, there were business owners that would probably go back to their existing banks for loans for these purchases but we prepped the bank ahead of time to offer themselves as the backup bank. The results were great. The targeted question allowed them to offer support more specifically and effectively.

Who is one person you admire most in your industry? This is a particularly good question to find other top influencers and, hopefully, great networkers you would like to meet. You are looking for those influencers who are “ready, willing and able” to network with you. By asking this question you Great networking starts with great questions, so the next time you go to a networking event or you just want to brush up on your networking skills, try asking one of these great questions and see what happens. How do you open up relationships when you are social networking? Do you think social networking in person is still more effective than online?

The article continues on to share that this new organization will continue to provide exceptional word-of-mouth marketing programs that leverage the power of their pre-existing relationships with top bloggers such as Liz Strauss Successful-Blog.com.

The company has locations in Austin, Seattle and Houston.  Ivy Worldwide is recommended by community influencers as the best company with the best approach for word-of-mouth marketing. For more information, visit Ivy World Wide.

With Networlding we emphasize that there are “Givers,” “Takers” and “Exchangers.” We advocate that there is a big difference between each of these three. Of course we all know about “The Takers.” They are usually the subject of most talks by top networking experts.

Instead, I focus on how “The Giver” is different from “The Exchanger.” An example is a good friend of mine who is the poster child of “The Giver.” She gives and gives and gives but then, at the end of each year, she often ends up with little in exchange. Why? Because she did not ask for anything in return. And, because she is so busy giving, she doesn’t have time to really realize the benefits of an exchange.

Exchangers take time qualifying others as to  how they can create a more mutually beneficial exchange of support. In Networlding I reference our “Seven Levels of Support” that help people understand what they have to give and what they can request in exchange. In an exchange, just as Ivy Worldwide has made explicit and part of how they implement their online campaigns, the upfront knowledge and agreement as to what a good exchange would be results in a mutually beneficial outcome that can ripple(just like an good networking initiative) beyond all participants most hopeful expectations. The “Network Effect” created then cannot be compared to transactional campaigns that have only a goal for immediate gratification and a limited vision.

Fortune 500 Series: FedEx delivers success through social media …
By Jennifer Leggio

Blogger, Jennifer Leggio showcases The FedEx Citizenship blog that provides insights from their employees into FedEx global citizenship programs and the The FedEx Cares Week blog is an internal blog that chronicles the annual global philanthropy event by having team members share their stories about the community service projects. …

Hill and Knowlton’s New Blogging Code of Conduct

Hill and Knowlton publish their blogging “Code of Conduct.” This is a nice model for other organizations to use.

The Top Six Reasons Companies are Still Scared of Social Media

This article showcases the reasons why companies are afraid of social media. Whereas they are typical reasons that make sense, the article is good at aggregating the most common reasons. The hurdles for companies are getting lowered by organizations like SAS who take on the risk, trusting and encouraging their employees to blog and prove that it is still better to be “out there” than to hide behind corporate walls.

My Take

I spoke with a couple of social media experts this week and found that, once again, myopia is still alive, well and living in peoples’ minds still. By this I mean that many see social networking as their ticket to great success. They think that because there are so are confused how to make social networking work that there is a huge market out there and that they can just put a shingle out that states they are social media experts overnight. Recently someone shared they had a construction worker friend who is now teaching LinkedIn.

I’ve been teaching people social networking for more than a decade and up until last year many still didn’t understand the basics of business networking. Now there are five times the number of experts on the subject than there were even three months ago. What a strange time this is! It will be interesting to see how all this shakes out in the next couple of years. I remember when I use to hold networking events and there was an over abundance of bankers; then came the plethora of coaches. Now everyone is a social networking and new media expert. Hmmmmm.

What does it look like to build trust online? Maybe showing rather than telling will be more helpful. Let me start with an actual campaign I am currently implementing.

Event: A live event in Chicago teaching social media

Target market: Lawyers

Date scheduled: Last two weeks in October

1.  I started by going through my network on LinkedIn
2. I limited my search to those in my network
3.  I discovered I had 318 lawyers in my network
4. I created what I call a two-step email–first a query to find out if there was interest, and
second, if interested, an email to present the workshop offering.

I have used this approach, again and again, to connect with people that I know as well as those I don’t. My approach is to ALWAYS be as authentic as I can be and to create a connection.

What else? I also really work on my emails to these new connections making sure I make my request simple and short. So a script might look like this:

Dear X,

I am currently in your network and wanted to reach out and ask if you might be interested in a social media workshop I will be hosting in Chicago at the end of October? I have over seven years of experience helping thousands learn to leverage social media tools like LinkedIn. Please let me know if you would like me to send more information.

Best,

Melissa Giovagnoli

—————————————————————

But, of course, each campaign you create is unique and should be as tailored as possible to create the best “first impression.” That takes some time and thoughtfulness, but, if you build a network of connections, one good first connection conversation, at a time, you will go a long way toward starting a “trust continuum” that will have a long-term payback.

I may not have the “Perfect Solution” for you, but after more than 20 years in business and authoring 11 books (four that have been on best-seller lists) on business development, marketing, networking productivity and leadership, I can offer tools, tips, strategies and networking support for many. Would you like to be included?

If so, here is a simple offer. If you purchase the Networlding Book by clicking here and forward me a copy of your receipt to melissa@networlding.com, I will send you a copy of my Networlding E-Tips Booklet with 101 of my best tips and strategies as well as a powerful and easy guide to getting the most out of LinkedIn.

In Malcolm Gladwell’s new book on success– Outliers: The Story of Success by Malcolm Gladwell (Hardcover – Nov 18, 2008) he talks about the 10,000 hour rule. Experts are defined as those who have at least 10,000 hours of research and development in a chosen field.  Note that the experts listed below exemplify the type of expert level you would choose if you are very serious about successful networking.

Donna Fisher
www.donnafisher.com
An introvert who learned how to network. Over 12 years ago she established Donna Fisher Presents in order to fulfill her lifelong desire to teach and inspire people to be all they can be. With her two businesses she combines her love of music and motivation.

Jill Lublin
www.jilllublin.com
Praised as a modern-day Dale Carnegie and co-author of the bestselling books Networking Magic, Guerrilla Publicity. Guerrilla Publicity contains hundreds of proven techniques and sure-fire tactics for any business, large or small, to launch an effective and creative publicity campaign.

Michael Hughes
http://www.speakersgroup.com/michael_hughes_bio.html
Michael has done extensive research on, and is a specialist in, utilizing networking as a business strategy. He is author of the 110-page special report entitled “Networking for Results: How to Leverage Relationships into More Sales and Profits”.

Michael Goldberg
http://www.buildingblocksconsulting.com
Michael Goldberg is a networking expert focused on helping sales producers and managers grow their practice. Michael speaks at conferences, runs sales meetings, and delivers dynamic programs on Networking, Referral Marketing, Sales Presentations, and Leadership.

Raeus Cannon
http://www.raeuscannon.com
Raeus Jae Cannon, CNPT, specializes in speaking to Chamber of Commerce groups. Raeus has first-hand experience of moving from shy and introverted to realizing success as an entrepreneur, trainer, author, and keynote speaker. Audiences can easily relate to Raeus’ personal stories and laugh at her experiences.

Susan RoAne
http://www.susanroane.com
Susan RoAne is the leading authority and original expert on how to work a room. She help companies and organizations successfully develop, build and manage client relationships that increase business growth.

Will Kintish
http://www.kintish.co.uk
The UK’s leading authority in Business Networking Skills training. Kintish have helped thousands of people become confident and effective networkers by offering business networking tips, techniques and training.

Bill Cates
http://www.referralcoach.com
Bill Cates, CSP, has revolutionized the way financial professionals generate an abundance of high-quality referrals. Bill has trained over 50,000 financial professionals in his proven referral system. And they are using his ideas to build their practices with quality referrals.

Heshie Segal
http://www.jetnettingconnection.com
Heshie Segal teaches her clients how to turn a business card, a presentation, and even a chance meeting into lasting business. JetNetting is an innovative and highly specific system of preparatory networking resulting in the eradication of cold calling, awkwardness and relationship tensions.

Renee Rosenberg
http://www.fiveoclockclub.com/speakers/Rosenberg.html
Renee Rosenberg has over 24 years experience in career management, counseling, coaching, and workshop training and facilitation. An accomplished and entertaining speaker, Renee regularly presents on a variety of topics including: effective intergenerational communication, and using positive thinking, laughter and optimism as career and life tools.

Robyn Henderson
http://www.networkingtowin.com.au/index.html
Robyn Henderson is a Global Networking Specialist. She has authored and contributed to 19 books (including 10 on networking and business building and 3 on self esteem and confidence building).

David Nour
http://www.relationshipeconomics.net
David Nour is a social networking strategist and one of the foremost thought leaders on the quantifiable value of business relationships. David is solving global client challenges with intracompany, as well as externally focused, Strategic Relationship Planning™.

Diane Darling
http://www.dianedarling.com
As a speaker and author, Diane Darling humorously shares her insights and techniques that can be immediately implemented helping people succeed.She is also a monthly columnist for the Boston Business Journal.

Bob Burg
http://www.burg.com
Bob Burg is a highly sought-after speaker at corporate, financial services and direct sales conventions. Combining humor and entertainment with easily applied, proven systems for personal marketing, audiences come away ready to immediately profit from Bob’s instruction and coaching.

Ivan Misner
http://www.bni.com
Dr. Ivan Misner is the Founder & Chairman of BNI, the world’s largest business networking organization. BNI was founded in 1985. The organization now has thousands of chapters throughout every populated continent of the world. Each year, BNI generates millions of referrals resulting in billions of dollars worth of business for its members.

Julia Hubbel
http://www.principlednetworking.com/index_alt.htm
Julia Hubbel is a professional speaker, seminar leader and prize-winning journalist who specializes in creating lasting, collaborative relationships. Her approach allows anyone to meet and mingle easily and with confidence, forming long-term business and personal alliances.

Andrea Nierenberg
http://www.nierenberggroup.com/index.php
Andrea R. Nierenberg, bestselling author and world-renowned business authority, is the force behind The Nierenberg Group. Called a “networking success story” by The Wall Street Journal, Andrea Nierenberg is founder and president of The Nierenberg Group.

Liz Lynch
http://www.networkingexcellence.com
Liz Lynch is author of Smart Networking: Attract a Following In Person and Online (McGraw-Hill, 2009) and a sought-after speaker who brings a practical and insightful perspective to networking that has connected with a global audience.

Melissa Giovagnoli
http://www.networlding.com
Melissa is one of the world’s leading experts on the development of individual and community leadership networks as a means of growing and accelerating brand loyalty and performance improvement inside and outside organizations.

Andy Lopata

www.lopata.co.uk
A Vice President of the Professional Speakers Association of the UK and a Director of the online network Word of Mouse, Andy is the co-author of two books on networking. His second book ‘…and Death Came Third! The Definitive Guide to Networking and Speaking in Public’ received worldwide acclaim and reached number 2 on Amazon.co.uk on its launch.

Donna Messer
http://www.connectuscanada.com
Donna Messer has been networking for the past 20 years. Donna Messer is President of ConnectUs Communications Canada, one of North America’s largest and most effective business matching companies.

Scott Allen
http://thevirtualhandshake.com/home.html
A 20-year veteran technology entrepreneur, executive and consultant, Scott Allen is the Entrepreneurs Guide for About.com. Scott has offered training programs in conjunction with business networking sites LinkedIn, Ryze, and others, plus courses on creating a powerful personal presence and growing your personal network on the internet.

Don Gabor
http://www.dongabor.com
Don helps professionals from all disciplines grow their revenues by starting profitable conversations with people in business and social situations.  e is the author of the bestseller, How to Start a Conversation and Make Friends, (Fireside/Simon & Schuster) and ten other books and tapes on interpersonal communication skills.

Mike O’Neil
http://www.integratedalliances.com
Founded in 2003, Integrated Alliances (IA) is a world leader in LinkedIn-related training with classroom workshop education (offline), web-based educational webinars (online) with both public and private sessions plus a rapidly expanding coaching and consulting practice.

Neen James
http://www.neenjames.com
Neen specializes in helping people within organizations to achieve amazing results by improving productivity in every aspect of their operations. Author of several books including Strategic Networking, Network or Perish, How to Run a Home Based Business, as well as many articles, e-zines and audio programs.

Daphne Medik
http://www.dmmcommunication.nl
Marketing communication and sales strategy, training and coaching. Inspiring ideas, practical solutions.

Thomas Power
http://www.ecademy.com
Thomas Power is the founder of ecademy.com. Helping business people thrive is what Ecademy facilitates.

Gerard De Gier
http://www.biocareerevent.nl/page/122
He conducts yearly a large number of training sessions in the fields of networking, creative business thinking (under the heading of “New Ideas on Your Command”), senior management and marketing. He also wrote several books on creative thinking (in collaboration with Professor Roger de Bruijn) and on networking.

Patrick Carney
http://referrals.ducttapemarketing.com/
Patrick Carney is a professional artist, networker, speaker and referral training consultant. He owns the Referral Institute – San Diego. In each of these roles, his focus is showing business professionals how to harness the power of referral marketing.

Jochem Klijn
http://www.netwerken.nl
Jochem Klijn has his own Business Network (www.netwerken.nl), travels throughout The Netherlands giving Network -training, -seminars and -courses and sells his English version eBook and AudioBook all over the world through his website: www.thelawofnetworking.com.

Sabine Tobback
http://www.culturaldetective.com
Sabine founded a training and coaching institute devoted to intercultural management, personal skills, human resources management, and leadership. She has developed programmes on virtual team effectiveness.

Jan Vermeiren
www.networking-coach.com
Originally Jan labeled his way of working “Marketing and Networking Coaching”. Due to the spectacular success of the networking activities, the marketing aspect has disappeared, though it is still Jan’s second passion. Now the company is primarily known under the brand name Networking Coach.

Some saw marketing as the necessary foundation to build sales. Others saw sales as the most important part of the business development cycle as that is where the real relationship begins with one’s client or customer. I weighed in on the discussion emphasizing that I see sales and marketing as equally important along with the element of networking that basically glues the two initiatives together when done right.

What the answers revealed to me most is that when marketing, sales and even networking experts have such differing opinions as to the role and importance of the strategies they suggest businesses use, how do business leaders decide how to most effectively grow revenues? One of the most important things I would suggest is to start to read some of the marketing and sales questions on sites like LinkedIn. I found I gravitated to answers that were simple, to the point and often metaphorical. For example, one person said something like selling without good marketing to support it would be like trying to row a row boat without any oars.

Keep your marketing, sales and networking as simple as possible–focused on the end goal–continuously creating value for your client. The rest is just background music.

• Learn continuously
• Endorse experimentation
• Break old patterns
• Identify commonalities
• Build unbroken "circles" not networks
• Leverage your assets (behaviors, skills, relationships)

Networlding recognizes the naturally occurring organic interconnectedness of people from all walks of life and simply provides a fertile soil for those seeds of value-based relationships to be planted to create endless possibilities. These possibilities are truly transformational. Think about that.To transform means to change. Something cannot change beyond itself. Its possibilities for change exist only within the limits of its inherent nature. What I see most often in business today is that most business professionals put limits on the people they think they can reach. The truth is we are truly six people or fewer away from anyone we want to meet. It’s really just a matter of making up your list, finding the right partners and believing “anything is possible” which is the number one belief of those people who do build that leadership support network that helps them leverage transformational opportunities for a lifetime.

Is it time for you to begin too? Are you ready? If not now, when?

Stephanie Leavitt is the Social Networking Strategist at Carnival Cruise Lines in Miami, Florida (www.carnival.com). Her background includes experience in youth marketing, public relations and social media.

How did you get started? It goes back to an internship with Gollin Harris, which was about seven years ago. That internship was for anti-tobacco work around youth activism. The project focused on viral and online social marketing efforts, but was before social networking as a media trend came about.

? Did you see social networking on the horizon? Yes, as I went to my next internship at Fleishman Hillard in NY the department focused on youth marketing. At that time we were going and finding online communities and posting on message boards for fans of certain bands playing for such events as Vans Warped Tour. Our client was Cingular who was focusing on the youth market. I started to see a growth in the number of people who were on message boards. Although most were considered "youth", the age span of the participants ranged from children to grandparents. This was also around the time that blogs first emerged.

What happened next in your evolution around social networks? I then had my senior class in college, Florida International University, got involved in the IAA’s InterAd student competition contest with our client being Yahoo! who wanted to focus on the youth consumer. We did a lot of research; spoke with a lot of teenagers and found they really wanted a lot of free stuff. Yahoo wanted more users for a variety of their products so we put together an integrated campaign to encourage users to involve their friends in actually using more Yahoo services. Our team ended up winning first place in the U.S. and Canada and second place in the global contest. We didn’t realize it then, but the underlying theme of our campaign was social networking.

So what happened next? I graduated and got a job in public relations and marketing, but the more and more experience I got the more I noticed the big change to online media. People started believing in it more—especially the youth (many of whom were transitioning into the entry level workforce). They see this form of marketing as more authentic than traditional advertising and marketing.

I was, however, continuing to do traditional pr and so I decided to blog on my own. I launched my own blog on Generation Y’s influence on marketing and pr and I also joined the Public Relations Society of America where I served as the vice chair for the New Professionals Group. There I spearheaded the launch of the new pros blog. I continued to see the decline of traditional media and decided that I would look for a job in social media, which was the on the rise.

When did you end up at Carnival? It was June of 2007 that I was hired by Carnival. At that time they had a social media site that had launched in 2006, www.carnivalconnections.com, which focuses on building community for those interested in cruises. Carnival also had a few other social media projects in development, including a popular travel blog.

What is special about the site? For a corporate website we are pretty open. People are free to say what they want so there are negative as well as positive comments. This is rare as many organizations are hesitant to have these types of comments on their sites.

We have a very popular blog written by our senior cruise director, John Heald, (www.johnhealdsblog.com) that launched in March 2007 and has resulted in a "Bloggers Cruise." Over 800 attended that cruise. Another example is Carnival Connections. There was a group of users who gave themselves the name "Coconut Monkey Head Group" based on a popular cruise drink they had when sailing. These people met on the site (have never met face-to-face) and are now planning to take a group cruise together. These are just two examples of social media helping grow bottom line sales.

What are you passionate about in the future in business and then in your personal life? In business, it would be creating authentic two-way communication with our guests. In my personal life it would be travel and spending time with my family, friends and my dog, Cocoa, a mini-dachshund.

Bonus Question: How do you like using LinkedIn? I like it and am not as involved as I would like to be, but I plan to use the question and answer tools more in the future.

I’ve been fortunate enough to work with great companies, GE, Heller Financial, Transamerica, and Administaff. My background is in corporate finance, strategy, marketing and business development. I have opened new markets, repositioned products, and structured transactions for both large and small companies. My business development has meant building relationships within the Board room, various levels of businesses and spheres of influence. This experience has been primarily in business to business. I have also been a believer in giving back to the community and have built relationships in a variety of not for profit organizations. I have also had the good fortune of advising entrepreneurs in start up situations. All of these experience help bring a perspective that can be helpful to a variety of situations.

Melissa: If you had to prioritize what you think is most important for companies to focus on today, what would that list of priorities look like?

Companies should develop and follow a strong mission statement and realize that their people are their most important asset. They need create a culture of integrity, honesty, and collaboration and one that keeps an eye on their customers. An eye on the customer is accomplished by monitoring performance and giving and getting honest feed back. Sometimes companies and their leadership put their head in the sand; always know if you are winning, loosing or just marking time. Knowing where you stand helps get you where you need to go.

Melissa: Where do values fit into the work you do?

You start with honesty and integrity and add being respectful of people and their ideas. You create a collaborate culture, by being a team player, and when you win the team wins. Also, you temper all of this with being a realist: seeing reality as it is, not as we wish it was.

Melissa: How does what’s happening online effect how businesses do business today and how they should be using technology—or not, to succeed?

Your product, service, or value proposition need to be available on the Internet; whether to sell, explain, describe, deliver and or service. E commerce is required to compete effectively. You need to assess emerging trends or changes in the marketplace; you must consistently monitor with vigilance your competitors, suppliers and your customers. You need to know what they are saying and what they are thinking; all of this is possible through the Internet and the blog community. With information, you can tweak, improve and drive revenues.

Melissa: If you could have the "perfect job", Chuck, what would that look like today?

Ideally, a great fit for me would be to join a creative corporate environment that wishes to expand its products or services into new markets or wants to take their large enterprise solutions into the small and mid size market which is the third most robust economy in the world. Also important to me, would be a company where my skills and experiences are valued and where I can help build, expand or improve its services or products. It would also be important that I have the opportunity to grow and learn through my endeavors.

Melissa: Chuck, what other things do you think companies should be doing today that they are not doing?

Companies should be developing, challenging, and encouraging their employees. They need to know if they are succeeding with their people development and building talent for the future. Companies should get feedback on a regular basis. This will hopefully create an environment where employees have personal ownership in making the business more successful or better at improvements as they grow and develop.

Melissa: Where do you think the really best business opportunities reside in today’s world of business?

I believe the best opportunities exist in the small and midsized business, SMB space. Many owners and founders have found success through niches and have found success by being solutions driven. The SMB space has become global in nature. Opportunities lie in finding improvements in markets or products no matter how mature if they bring value that is efficient. As I said before there is constant change, and insatiable appetite for new products and ideas. (add any questions you think would be good) Business and the economy are not a straight line. How do you help in a downturn or a period of change? I create a realistic assessment of strengths and weakness and the relevance of the business proposition to a changing marketplace. Then I plan for what is critical to serve the customer. Through my market access, I can get a realistic view of changing dynamics in the market. I communicate with the management team what the challenges are and make recommendations of what is needed. I believe this helps manage expectations of what we can deliver to our stakeholders, customers and employees. Managing expectations brings a practical understanding of what can be delivered to all parties. This typically results in working together toward a common goal.  To contact Chuck directly, email him at charles.smead@gmail.com,